Wanderings of a RuinExplorer

#AloneTogether I've had a lot of time to think recently. Alone. But I'm hoping I can share. Insomnia combined with unnatural sleep inertia is a particularly bad combination - latest side effects of medication trials. I'm on my second dosage change on the third prescription in a series of attempts to find medicine that helps. Even being medicinally resistant (which isn't helping find a solution) doesn't seem to be helping with withdrawals when necessary change-ups are needed. After a period of about eight months which included constant visits to various specialists - oncologist, rheumatologist, gastroenterologist, and suspected diagnosis - cancer, not cancer, autoimmune, not autoimmune, sclerosing mesenteritis, I can't even say that last one correctly twice in a row... the diagnosis is Fibromyalgia. Fibromyalgia is a relatively common condition affecting about 2% of the adult population in the US (4 million US adults - CDC1). It's just really

My grandfather once shared a dream from his hospital bed. He described that he had passed through the veil between this world and the next. Upon arrival he felt the impression to wait, that there he would be met by someone to guide him. Thus he sat to wait. He said it was not the brightness nor the light that most impressed him - these he had expected. Rather, it was the level of activity, the extreme busyness with which he found himself surrounded by that most impressed him. He shared that after a little while, he left - feeling perhaps he was not yet expected. It was not long after sharing this experience that my grandfather passed away. I can't help but ponder on his words as I'm sure he did on his experience. Were I, like him, obviously near the end of my time on earth, either confined to a bed or body failing with age, left to ponder and perhaps regret my inability to continue to contribute to my posterity, Decide then that the time honored adage, "Rest is Peace"

Games innately appeal to most people. They engage, entertain, challenge, and reward players. They have many forms nowadays including cards, board games, table top role-play, and video games to name a few. Now there are games that involve reaction times and timing, but more often than not what appeals to gamers is making decisions that either improve or hurt their position when played out alongside the decisions of other players. This element of game theory presents in both competitive and cooperative formats. Usually the winning strategy is to reduce or eliminate options from your opponent causing them to act in a limited or predictable way or in the case of cooperative games, to increase the number of options to your allies empowering them with perhaps a more optimal strategy. It turns out this strategy is a far more prevalent and deeper aspect of the human experience itself. In business, a move that puts you a position with greater options is usually the optimal one. In warfar

Yesterday I matched my body mass in dead-lift at the gym. For the typical bodybuilder, not noteworthy. For me, this is a big flipping deal: http://ruinexplorer.blogspot.com/2016/05/20160528.html http://ruinexplorer.blogspot.com/2016/05/20160514.html You see, a little over a year ago, I destroyed my back. Months later learned that I had degenerative back disease, bulging and outright dissected disks. I used a cane, A CANE. After months of talk, Baker convinced me to come to the gym with him. It started out slow. I was sore a lot. originally 4-5 times a week, 2 hours a session. I've slowed to 3 times a week for about an hour and a half, but I'd like to take that back up. Before his help, hadn't ever even attempted a dead-lift. In any case, my back may still be completely screwed, but now it seems to have enough supporting structure it doesn't bother me as much. I have more strength than I did. I haven't lost any weight, but my waistline has lost a couple inch

I have been working a lot recently with millennials. There is a phrase I believe is at the heart of their problems and quite possibly the population at large, "I can't." In my personal experience, there exists no more damaging claim - no more debilitating, depression invoking, self-fulfilling prophesy in existence. I recognize that millennials in particular were raised in a world where they were brought up believing they could do anything. Compound that with mobile devices where the answer to nearly anything was immediate. When smacked square in the face with 'adulting,' this combination made for disaster. (their word, not mine) 'Adulting' is hard and nothing is immediate. Everything they know is now challenged. Some adapt. Interestingly enough, it seems those that have already endured hardships adapt fastest. Adversity becomes a source of strength. More power to them. But what of those with expectations borne of YouTube successes? (this applies to much mo

<warning>this post contains far more unrelated detail than you're probably anticipating</warning> Last night was a ton of fun. Had a dozen friends over for a card game tournament which went late into the wee hours (2:30am before the after-game games started - I went to sleep, sorry Liz - should have warned you...). It served as a fantastic distraction to the 'real world.' Woodworking as recently evolved for me. It use to be something I simply enjoyed. You're might be familiar with various species of wood, their different grains and characteristics. Woodworking has always appealed to me on some level for its intention to abruptly bring amazing order to the product of decades of uninhibited entropy. But that's tangent for another day. Recently, due to a desire to wrap up or at least make great strides on the bunk bed project, my wife has been playing interception to allow for greater stretches of uninterrupted time working on it. I'm more frequently fi